Being Judgemental

This time topic is quite self revealing about what i m going to discuss. So lets talk about it. All of us know that being judgemental is a bad thing. But some or other time we tend to do this knowingly or unknowingly. Mostly when some girls have more than one affair, or when someone is doing something out of the league, or when someone has a different belief system, etc, etc. I can quote many but lets stop and talk how to stop all these things.

Well i have caught  myself judging others very few times. And the biggest reason, is a simple thought which is always there in my mind. Before telling my thought i will share one dialogue from a movie, which says- Whenever we have to judge someone with justice we must always imagine ourselves wearing the same boots which the other person wore, and walk with them for some time, then you can take a correct decision. In gita it was said that nyay(justice) must be made with a feel of Karuna. We must try to feel what other person must have gone through, what type of conditions have led him to do this. So this is what comes to my mind at the time when such situation arise- If i were in the exact same situation i might as well done the same thing.And as we all know we never judge ourselves . So how can i  judge myself this time. We just understand our situation. So this is what i end up with. I try to understand the situation which my friend have gone through and don't end with judging them.

One other major side effect of judging is bringing fear in our own life. When we judge someone we say that how can he do that. But its also not wrong that in life there are many mistakes which happens in everyone's life. So when we get into the same problem as others have gone through and we have already said a lot about them, we are left with no help from outside world. As we have made enough chaos in everyone's life, so we already know that no one will come to help us. And the worst part is, we are afraid that someday our secret life will be open to everybody and they will know what i  'm in reality.

So friends don't be judgemental , its always mostly the situation which makes a person do some wrong, try to understand them and most important thing is our time is very precious don't waste it in others, invest it in making a better you everyday. 

GF and BF relationships of 21st century.

In starting of  every relationship, we feel very much excited about each other. Everything what we do together becomes a "first time" thing for us. First time going to shopping, first time eating pizza together, first time watching movie in theater,first time hugging,kissing and bla bla bla... .But these first time things end in one or 2 years if we consider 21st centuries relationships. Its because now a days, everyone is in a hurry of doing as much thing as they can in less time. That's good also in some cases but here its different.  So when two peoples have spent so many good days together and made so many beautiful memories find out that now there is nothing new in their relationship, they lose excitement of being in a relationship. This happens either from one side or both. Mostly its from one side. 

One of the reason behind why this happens is that, we decide to get into relationship in very less time, without observing each others behavior. We even don't know  small habits of each other. In starting phase , we are so much excited as we are doing many things first time with someone, that we don't observe each other. But the sad part is, when the excitement is gone , all first thing are over, we come back to our boring life then we start to notice the annoying habits or behavior of our partner. We start complaining , judging and end up with breakup. 

So what i think why this happens is - we don't want to be alone . We want someone who can listen to us. So we try to get into relationship asap. I don't think its wrong, i just think somethings should  be changed to make it right. In my views , instead of getting into relationship , we can still continue to talk to each other and try to understand whether they are of our type or not. And when we have understood each others behavior, nature, habits and everything which we need to know, and still we are ok with that. Then its the right time to get into a relationship.